Don’t worry, concerned ladies and gents. It’ll be OK.
Whether you’re struggling to find the right person to spend your life with or are attempting to move on from a painful break-up or divorce, resolve to live your single life to its very fullest this year.
According to experts, making some small changes and improvements in your personal and social life can boost your love life immeasurably.
“Try something new,” suggests Rachel Machacek (rachelmachacek.com), author of The Science of Single, who has personally tried just about every dating avenue possible. “Be daring or at least choose something outside of your comfort zone. Take a class on home brewing. Learn trapeze. Sign up for an improvisation workshop. Do the yoga teacher training you’ve always thought about doing. You and you alone are in charge of your social schedule, so it’s essential to set aside time to connect with people and create a full life for yourself … aim for one to two new things a month.”
So once your calendar is full of new hobbies and activities and you’re suddenly meeting piles of extremely date-able people, what’s a girl or guy to do?
Screenwriter Jennifer Peepas, the advice blogger behind the brilliant Captain Awkward (captainawkward.com) thinks that singles should resolve to be pickier than they’ve ever been before.
“Dating takes a lot of time and energy,” says Peepas. “I think we should go out on a lot of first dates and meet a lot of people, but be very strict about our time with second dates. If the person is not as cool as your friends and the time spent on the date is not enjoyable for its own sake, why are you trying to talk yourself into hanging out again?”
If you’re open to being set up by friends and family (fair warning: proceed with great caution, for here there be dragons) but no one seems to be stepping up to the plate, Flirting, Dating and Relationship Coach Fran Greene (www.frangreene.com) advises that you make it known to your networks that you are most certainly in the dating market. Use Facebook. Use Twitter. Maybe even email your contacts list. Networking is as key to successful dating as it is to a successful career trajectory.
“Let everyone know,” says Greene. “You can even be a bit outrageous and say that you are offering theatre tickets and a limo ride to whomever introduces you to the love of your life.”
(Incidentally, I am offering a trip to the Bahamas to the lovely person who introduces me to the brilliant, hilarious, cultured and dreamy dude of my dreams. Just so we’re clear on that, Canada.)
Ian Andrew Bell, CEO of AppSocial Media and creator of the mobile dating application Tingle (tingle.com) wants you to take a deep breath now.
“Lighten up and relax,” Bell says. “Don’t treat every date like an audition. Make the most of being single, as it’s very likely a state of being that will pass to memory soon enough. In the meantime, be open to meeting all different sorts of people in all different sorts of ways, and don’t place the burden of expecting a life-long love affair on every new meeting. Even when your goal is a lifetime partner, the journey of being single is as important as the destination.”
Singles: As unlikely as it seems right now, this too shall pass. Let’s enjoy the ride while we can.
Sexy Typewriter blogs about her dating failures – online and otherwise – atSexytypewriter.com